Motherhood – the ride

Motherhood…… a roller coaster of emotions, phases and stages. 

Enter the toddler stage. Or as I like to call it the emotional mini human stage. Aria turned one just over a month ago and if the newborn stage wasn’t a shock to the system this certainly is. It was almost instant my relatively carefree cruisey little cookie has found her voice and her temper.

Being clueless to the world of parenting I actually didn’t know that one year olds got angry. How ear piercing their screams can be and that they can and will go through every single emotion more then once in a single day. I’m actually finding this phase very challenging. Even more so then the newborn phase or the 4am waking phase or the I don’t want to nap in the day phase. 

I wouldn’t say that I am a stressed or anxious person in general but I am finding these outbursts and tantrums and the sudden dislike to everything I cook is raising my stress levels and at times pushing me to my limit. Is this wrong to admit? Am I alone here? Throw in teething and moving house and well yes I’m sure you can imagine. I was feeling flat. There has been tears (both mine and hers) and lots of deep breaths have been taken.

Just like every stage in the journey you can read about it and try prepare yourself for it but until you are going through it you don’t understand fully what you are in for and once again you are faced with new changes, a new routine and new challenges and of course new and wonderful experiences with your mini. Just like they are learning to adapt and adjust to their new developmental changes and milestones us mamas need to as well.

This is not meant to be negative it’s just a reminder to myself and to you that whatever phase or stage your in with your bub that you got this! That we all deal with each stage differently and so do our babies. There is no one fits all when it comes to the challenges of #mumlife and the best thing we can do is surround ourselves with other mamas, family and friends and share our experiences and learn from each other. 

Remembering that what challenges me won’t necessarily challenge you and vice versa. Feeling stressed or struggling at certain stages is not a fail. It’s all part of the ride. I loved my pregnancy and found the newborn phase challenging but I coped and just like everything in life you can reflect back and know you got through it. The good and the bad. Some mothers find challenges in their pregnancy, some in the newborn phase, others struggle with bed time battles, feeding issues the list goes on…. we are all different.

We are only at the beginning of toddlerhood so I know there are many new challenges to come and then we will be on to the next phase/stage. We will essentially be in a phase/stage for the rest of our lives and I love knowing that… it’s scary and exciting but I love it. So finding ways that guide you through is important.

I find hearing other mamas stories and following their ‘unperfect’ journeys very  helpful at times of high stress. It’s reminds me that it’s ok to have bad days …. we all do. Take each day as it comes and throw the parenting manual (that’s right there is no such thing) in the bin and do things your way.

I definitely let it get to me a little but I’ve picked myself back up and I’m doing things that help me cope in stressful times again. For starters talking about it….. getting it out and off your chest (hence this post), I’ve been walking twice a day again. Walking is my therapy and I’m doing some home workouts again too. Mum time on a Friday night (wine and facial ) is amust and most importantly remembering you are not alone.

 My tantrum Mantra ……

 ‘This to shall pass’ 

I hope that whatever stage or phase you are going through with your little one you realise what a great job you are doing and that you can and will get through whatever challenges come your way.

We started our day so positive and well but today was hard, I wrote this at nap time and things just got progressively worse. By 4pm I had written it off as one of the worst days I’d had as a mother but then at 5 my happy, giggling, smiling, cheeky, beautiful, smart and wonderful little daughter was back and reminded me what I am here for and how even on the toughest days you still get some of the most rewarding moments and memories. 

I would love to hear how you guys cope with tantrums and challenging days? What helps you ?

Lots of love 

Xx

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